| Teesus | Date: Friday, 2013/10/11, 1:53 PM | Message # 1 | DMCA |
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Having lived in the former Soviet Union for 10 years, I will forever have plastered to the back of my cerebellum the commemorative bumper sticker: "WWSD?"What Would Stalin Do? It's a useful question to ask sometimes, because it offers valuable perspective. What would Stalin have done with Britney Spears? Have her declared a People's Artist of the Soviet Union, with the Leningrad-Murmansk train line named after her.
Dan Dierdorf would have been made Secretary of the Sverdlovsk Region. Shepard Smith would probably get to head up the Press Ministry to start, then maybe work his way up to Foreign Affairs. It's hard not to look at the American cultural landscape and see all sorts of people the old seminarian would really have liked.But the main reason I'm thinking of this now is the debt ceiling/government shutdown issue. How would Stalin have handled all of this?
Reflexively, I can't help but wonder.I'm guessing he would have taken Tea Party Sen. Ted Cruz's caucus members, loaded them onto cattle cars, and relocated them to a piece of woodsy wilderness in Alaska's Chugach National Forest. Once there, guards would have handed saws and hammers to the esteemed legislators (still dressed in suits and heels – no wasteful government spending on parkas!) and instructed them to build new congressional "branch offices" out of the still-living trees surrounding them.
Always conscious of cost, Stalin preferred, whenever possible, to relocate pesky populations to remote deserts and taigas rather than waste bullets liquidating
them. Tea Party congresspersons would naturally be one of the first nationalities moved.
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Message edited by Teesus - Friday, 2013/10/11, 1:56 PM |
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