Borowitz Report
September 24, 2014
Americans Who Have Not Read a Single Article About Syria Strongly Support Bombing It
By Andy Borowitz
Credit PHOTOGRAPH BY ABDALGHNE KAROOF/REUTERS
WASHINGTON, D.C. (The Borowitz Report) — In a positive development for the U.S.-led campaign of air strikes in Syria, a new poll indicates strong, broad-based support for the mission among people who have yet to read a news article about Syria.
According to the poll, released on Tuesday, the bombing campaign got a thumbs-up from people who had no information about Syria’s civil war, including its duration, the parties involved, and what a Sunni is.
Additionally, the air strikes garnered enthusiastic support from people who could not correctly identify the President of Syria, tell
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Syria Becomes the 7th Predominantly Muslim Country Bombed by 2009 Nobel Peace Laureate The Intercept Note ---- Six weeks of bombing hasn’t budged ISIS in Iraq, but it has caused ISIS recruitment to soar. That’s all predictable: the U.S. has known for years that what fuels and strengthens anti-American sentiment (and thus anti-American extremism) is exactly what they keep doing: aggression in that region.
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New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie
New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie doesn't plan to make the state's promised payment—under a law he personally pushed for—to public worker pensions. But while the 2016 Republican hopeful is shorting money intended for workers,
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 Microsoft Corp. is currently sitting on almost $29.6 billion it would owe in US taxes if it repatriated the $92.9 billion of earnings it is keeping offshore, according to disclosures in the company’s most recent annual filings with the Securities and Exchange Commission. The amount of money that Microsoft is keeping offshore represents a significant spike from prior years, and the levies the company would owe amount to almost the entire
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 Hillary Clinton's political allies want Democratic primary voters to believe that the former secretary of state is just like populist Massachusetts senator Elizabeth Warren, and they've been claiming that there are no differences between the two possible presidential contenders. There's just one problem: That's not true.
Clinton last week filled in for George W. Bush at an Ameriprise conference, continuing a speaking tour that is raking in big money from Wall Street. One of her aides later downplayed the idea that Clinton's relationship with the financial sector could be a political liability for her, should she face Warren in the 2016 Democratic presidential primaries. The aide defiantly insisted that the two are exact
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 President Franklin D. Roosevelt broadcasts his annual message to Congress on January 11, 1944, in Washington, DC. (AP Photo)The Wisconsin Public Radio/National Public Radio show To the Best of Our Knowledge regularly asks writers if they have a "Dangerous Idea” that they would like to talk about (unscripted). My Dangerous Idea was American exceptionalism. The democratic idea of American exceptionalism insisted that We the People can govern — that we don’t need kings and aristocrats — that we can govern ourselves. I did not speak on the dangers of the right-wing
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 While Americans tend to see their country’s involvement in Iraq as two discrete conflicts – "Operation Desert Storm” in 1991, and the 2003 Iraq war — most Iraqis view it as one protracted campaign.They have good reason. We’ve been waging hot and cold war on Iraq for almost a quarter of a century. As American boots once again hit the ground in Baghdad — and as the Obama administration mulls other "options” — it’s important to remember that after 24 years of military, political and economic intervention in Iraq’s affairs we’ve caused a lot of death and hard
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